Has Expectation Let You Down?
Many of us grew up with expectations of our own towards others and the expectations of others being put upon us. Both of these are very destructive and can cause an enormous amount of pain. Before we begin let's just briefly learn what the word expectation means.
Expectation according to scripture is another way of saying hopeful or having hope.
Living life in expectation is a life lived looking for others to fill a void. When we pass our expectation to someone else, who are we putting in charge? Even though you gave the expectation away are you still holding on? If that person accepts your expectation you have now linked yourself to that person (think of a string).
What happens if that person does not meet your expectation? Who is the one that gets hurt? The perception is you now have the upper-hand and believe the other person is doing what it takes to meet that expectation. Is this the truth? Absolutely not, but thoughts can be deceiving. The truth is this gives you the illusion that your're in charge and the thought process that happens is, they better keep there end of the deal.
This is like when someone places an expectation on you and for some reason you did not follow through on what they were hoping for. A life of great disappoints takes us down a road of self-centerness and poor me lifestyle. These words may seem harsh, but from personal experience I have been there.
How do I know this is true? Well let's start with scripture. The bible tells us that our hope and expectation should be in Jesus Christ, therefore that completely eliminates me and the other person.
Psalm 62:5 For God alone my soul waits in silence and quietly submits to Him, For my hope is from Him.
Proverbs 10:28 The hope of the righteous [those of honorable character and integrity] is joy, But the expectation of the wicked [those who oppose God and ignore His wisdom] comes to nothing.
Nowhere in the bible does it say that our hope or expectation should be in man. As a matter of fact it is the complete opposite. The bible tells us
Job 41:9 Behold, the hope of him is in vain: shall not one be cast down even at the sight of him?
Proverbs 10:28 The hope of the righteous shall be gladness: but the expectation of the wicked shall perish.
There are many people that have some type of expectation in a person right now and sadly this will never fulfill their heart. Man can never satisfy another person. Why, because we were born with a hole in our heart. Who does the hole belong to?
Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has made everything beautiful and appropriate in its time. He has also planted eternity [a sense of divine purpose] in the human heart [a mysterious longing which nothing under the sun can satisfy, except God]—yet man cannot find out (comprehend, grasp) what God has done (His overall plan) from the beginning to the end.
Jeremiah 17:9 “The heart is deceitful above all things And it is extremely sick; Who can understand it fully and know its secret motives?
Proverbs 13:12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick, But when desire is fulfilled, it is a tree of life.
Giving yourself to another is only temporary happiness, love, accomplishments, and so forth, but at some point those things will die and crumble and your expectation will not be met, because they cannot fulfill your need. The only person that can fill your heart is Jesus, and the only one who will never let you down is Jesus. Jesus is the answer! He might not answer us the way WE want, but He will answer us truthfully, lovingly, and peacefully. Jesus is never confusing!
My life was always filled with me, because being void of the love of God in my heart I thought life was about me. I thought I was giving, caring, loving, and you should want to be apart of my life. I had many expectations towards myself and others. I would get very upset if that person did not meet my expectation and I thought they did not love me. I believed I was doing that so why can't they! Life became so depressing and destructive that I tried to take my life twice. I just did not understand why people could not do what I wanted. When I got saved, I received a RUDE awakening about myself and my life. It literaly took several years just to see what I was doing to myself and others, but with that came spurts of freedom. I began to taste this freedom and started to search for more of it. Each time I got a taste I would hold on for as long as I could because it did not last for very long. As I grew deeper in the Lord life became harder, because I had to choose what I was going to believe. I had to choose between God's truth or man's lies. I found that most of the things I thought were a lie and expectation was one of them. I was raised in a family who's love was conditional, if I do this then you better, I did this for you so now you must do this for me and so forth. Lots of strings were attached to me and I had strings attached to other people. As I matured in the Lord I had to break the strings attached to me and I had to let go of the strings I had attached to others.
Do you have an expectation right now in your life? If so what is it? Have you attached it to another person? We pray that you will be set free from expecting things from yourself and others and learn to let go and let God be in control of your life and place your expectation in Him. Our life here is temporary therefore life each day is a step towards eternal life. When your mind is filled with Christ and heavenly treasure, you no longer expect others to fill your void.
Colossians 3:1 Therefore if you have been raised with Christ [to a new life, sharing in His resurrection from the dead], keep seeking the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your mind and keep focused habitually on the things above [the heavenly things], not on things that are on the earth [which have only temporal value]. 3 For you died [to this world], and your [new, real] life is hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is our life, appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory.
Thank you for reading, please share the good news of Jesus Christ.
Biblegateway.com (we use Bible verses from this site)